Ever had a work colleague that's a real tosser?

[Minty]

For the last decade I've been convinced workplaces have gone to the dogs ever since under 50s with purple hair were allowed to even be employed, let alone made managers, but what came to pass last week was a real advert for becoming self-employed. I really thought I'd seen it all, but this really was the limit.

It's not been fun at work for a number of weeks because the boss's favourite football club are currently under investigation for massive tax evasion and as the weeks roll by and more word leaks out about how bad their affairs are it looks set to be liquidated (it appears they were trading while insolvent for perhaps two years, how the heck did they get away with it), and so he is taking it out on everyone else (this is not an uncommon phenomena in my area of the country, where they take football far too seriously), so I was dreading what was to follow when back on Wednesday, I was called into the humourless muppet of a manager's office.

He and his frosty faced deputy bitch-queen-of-Hades wanted me to help take over part of someone's workload in a hurry, meaning working extra hours (at time-and-a-half? You're having a laugh! Normal rates "and like it"!) to get up to speed. Why? Because Adrian had decided to leave. Isn't he doing his month's notice? No, "we thought
it best if he went now."

Frosty Deputy suddenly gave a snort of the giggles. Words to the effect of "you may as well tell him, he'll find out eventually!" were exchanged, whereupon I discovered what I'd missed whilst away on my lunchbreak two days prior and that no one had saw fit to tell me.

It turned out that - whilst at his workplace - Adrian had been spotted "pleasuring himself". In an open plan office of about 20 people, in working hours.


Not by any old person, but with superb timing by the manager as he left his office whilst in the company of an important client they were hoping to get a crapload of much needed business off - who also saw what this example of "our highly committed team of professionals" were up to in company hours and was less than impressed.

It must have taken them ten times to relay to me what was now needing to be done, as I was more stunned than a rabbit in headlights.


They overestimated how much was needing to be taken on. Adrian was a professional "slacker", one of the reasons I hated him, but during my overtime I discovered that after the client had left, he'd been marched off the premises and everyone had been warned not to talk about his dismissal or they'd be next. I'd missed a real mega blow-up. I'd always thought Adrian was a w**ker (utterly sleezy horrible creep of a man that ought to have been
strangled at birth) but not literally in office hours!


Word to the younger members of the forum - when you join the world of work, make sure it's one with as little contact with human beings as possible, directly or indirectly, alive or dead. I'm beginning to realise that it's not the case I'm mad, it really is the rest of the human race that's lost not just the plot, but the key to the cupboard they'd left it inside.

[Cororon]

Maybe his job wasn't stimulating enough?

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[matt]

Makes me realise how lucky I am to work with a decent bunch, at least in our department anyway...