The Official Nonsense Thread

[Minty]

(15-05-2013 09:49 PM)Caspin Wrote:  I was sent this crib sheet for Game of Thrones. It still makes me chuckle. "Cool girl's murder friend".

In an upcoming episode of Game of Thrones, Arya Stark escapes with Gendry & Jaqen H'Ghar, realising only they can stop the war.

Reaching King's Reach, they are confronted by The Hound & Ilyn Payne. Arya argues with them that for the good of Westeros, they need to join forces, because the King is a complete puddle-drinker, his mother & real dad are evil puddle-drinkers, in fact if they think about it round about everyone in the whole city but them & Tyrion Lannister are puddle-drinkers.

Overwhelmed by such irrefutable logic, The Hound & Ilyn Payne aid them in attacking the city, the king's guard instantly yielding knowing they've not got a hope of beating such a cool gang. King Joffrey is beheaded & his utter bitch of a mother is hung over the city walls covered in jam so she is stung to death by wasps. Everyone in the city cheers at this turn of events.

Tyrion Lannister is offered the throne, but he points out it would be far funnier giving the Iron Throne to the fat baldy eunach as it will really piddle off Petyr Baelish, which will serve him right for betraying Ned Stark & having really stupid facial hair. Everyone agrees.

Upon hearing the news, Princess Daenerys Targaryen renounces her claim to the throne, because she doesn't want to sit on the same seat the fat eunach has sat on, & besides which she has cool dragons & so everyone else now sucks not to be her. Lord Tywin Lannister goes home in a terrible huff because "now you're all just being silly & not playing the game properly!"

HBO should have episodes like this!